Exhaustion from life

I have recently been getting back into the religous side of myself so I went to church today. And I don’t go to a small church my church is so big that you feel alone. We had a guest speaker today at my large church and it was a woman. She reminded me of wel…me. A little bigger, big curly hair, fun kind sense of being. So she was relatable. But beyond that…the sermon she gave was eye opening. She spoke on the standards of the american work force and how we are tryiing to save too much and do too much. We are trying to save enough pie for only us just in case even though there are so many starving people. She also discussed how organized sports and activities are breaking families and hurting more than helping. I am a product of organized theater and band. They have basically been my whole life besides swim team….and to hear her say these things break people apart…it resonated. Because honestly, it did. I was never really home for dinner at house and am not now as much either and as a result I have lost all desire to spend time with my family. Because I worked that hard as a youngin, I work twice as hard now and am burning a wick at more than two ends. And it needs to stop. I agreed with this woman, who looked so much and acted like me. I could see that she really knew what she was saying. She had lived through it. And when I looked around at the thousands of silenced, eyes stuck foreward people in that church, I realized I wasn’t the only one relating to this sermon. I wasn’t the only re living the rejections from those sports and acting auditions and chair auditions for band. Because in toay’s society that’s what defines a person. What they do, how well and how hard they are willing to fight for it and the money they make from the battle. But I ask, after that hard battle how many people really feel like living life ad having fun? Not that many. Because if we go to bed at night and just pass out or don’t even make it to bed…we are going to miss it. What are we going to miss? What we are on earth for…Jesus. We are going to miss him in the midst of our exhaustion. And if you don’t believe in him there are plenty of other things you will miss like outings with your famiy, time in general those you love, getting to realy know yoursef past the tired eyes and limbs. I am challenging myself to look past what I do to find who I am. And to really make the time to say no to others sometimes to just be with myself ad my family. Time is short. Don’t stay stuck at work and on your iphone all the days.

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